very high anxiety
My attacks come in a variety of situations. There can be 100 people or 10 people. Sometimes I can speak very persuasively and sometimes I panic for no understandable reason. It seems like when I have to go to a microphone out in an audience I have a harder time that when it is up at a podium in front of a room but not particularly.
At worst my anxiety makes my heart pound, my voice quiver uncontrollably, and my mind unable to focus on anything other than my fear which only feeds on itself making things worse. It does seem to me that if I can find a way to get into the beginning of speaking without "blowing my cover" or exposing myself, I can than gain confidence and be OK.
I am searching for ways to help me become more and more comfortable in different settings so I can do what I want to do and not be fearful of taking on new challenges.
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